Aspergers in Love: Couple Relationships and Family Affairs by Maxine Aston

By Maxine Aston

Asperger Syndrome (AS) has frequently been thought of to be incompatible with love and relationships, yet because the variety of diagnoses raises, it really is turning into obvious that folks with AS can and do have complete and intimate relationships. Maxine Aston frankly examines the basic elements of relationships which are frequently complex by way of the ailment. Illustrated with real-life examples, the booklet tackles matters equivalent to appeal, belief, verbal exchange, intimacy and parenting and features a part on commonly asked questions, making it a needs to for all people with AS and their companions, in addition to for neighbors, relatives and counselors.

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Additional info for Aspergers in Love: Couple Relationships and Family Affairs

Example text

Both partners say that in the beginning of the relationship they were able to disclose information about themselves. ° The majority of NT women say that although they can make disclosures to their partners these disclosures were rarely understood by them. 52 Aspergers in Love ° ‘Feeling deafness’ is sometimes responsible for the AS partner’s inability to hear and understand disclosures about feelings and emotions. ° Maintaining control is vital to AS adults. ° Most AS women are open and honest about themselves and do not feel threatened when making personal disclosures to their partners.

They reported having been told to read about different subjects, read the papers, join a college class or take up a new interest. Despite knowing what they could do to facilitate change, hardly any of the men converted the theory into practice. It can be very difficult for a person with Asperger syndrome to focus his mind on a subject in which he has little or no interest. This is due to the narrow and fixed area of interest often displayed in those with Asperger syndrome; although they may be experts on their chosen field or subject, they may show no interest whatsoever in anything else.

The area activated in the AS brain is the area used for logical and straightforward 42 Aspergers in Love problems, used by those with and without Asperger syndrome to work out practical things. This explains why it often takes someone with AS longer to work out a problem that demands some insight. It also explains why so often the wrong conclusion will be reached – instead of automatically knowing why their partner has reacted in a certain way, it is reasoned out in a logical way. This is probably the reason that so many women end up frustrated and upset trying to explain to their partners that they do not always want a practical and logical solution to what is bothering them.

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